This Summer in a few words

Meagan graduated
Meagan moved out
Mellie turned 1
Mike turned 45
Mom went back to work p/t and became completely overwhelmed and did much pouting
The babies went to day care 3 afternoons a week (see pouting above)
Summer flew by
We started to adjust
We still hate that mommy works but we're dealing with it


Michaels selling cars again
Meagans at HLG
Missy is in 8th grade
Mikayla is in 7th grade
Madilynn continues to be a Diva Girl
Melanie Faith is the SWEETEST baby you have ever seen, but a bit of a wild child, baby of the familyitis???

Happy Birthday Pretty Baby

Last thursday Miss Melanie turned 1! More to come on that later but here are some pics of my pretty baby

Wanna-Be Cake decorator

Soooo, I've in recent months decided I want to be our small town version of the Cake Boss.  Waaaayyy back in March I decided that with all the events, birthdays we had coming up in the next few months that I should just make the cakes instead of ordering them. It seemed to all really make sense in my "stretch the budget" plan. 

My first cake was a disaster, ugly ugly UGLY!!  The cakes I did for Kadie and Maddis double birthday were fair. Megs, gradution cake, hmmmmmm, well, I learned from it a little. Now, my baby, Miss Melanie is turning 1.  I've become obsessed with making her the most adorable cake ever.  I'm premaking royal icing butterflies and flowers, even a pretty little pink number 1.  I've started working on the cutest banners, yep two.   Guess what I've remembered, I'm not crafty.  I WANT to be crafty. There is a big difference, huge actually. Sooooo, on Sunday at the big bash I'm going to take close up pictures of my beautiful Melanie and far away pics of the cake and decorations.

My Graduate

My graduate!    So proud of her.

2 days

2 days until graduation.  Maddi is running 102 fever.  Mellie is snotty, very very snotty.  Not her personality, her nose.  The house is trashed!!  Badly trashed, a huge mess really!! I will never get the laundry all folded so it is hiding in my room.  Maddi's personality is snotty, AND  her nose.  She does not deal well with not feeling well.  I haven't even started to purchase the groceries for the party, or the decorations.

Did I mention we had a leak behind the tub surround and right now the bathroom is torn up too??? Yep. Yep. Yep.

Oh, and I had the cutest outfit picked out, with white pants WHITE pants.  Guess who's coming to visit early??
Fortunately I'm not freaking out or anything.......

Wow!

In the next 2 weeks one baby is graduating high school and THE baby is turning one!  Life is crazy while I plan 2 parties 2 weeks apart.  Graduation is Friday, I hope I'm ready.  Birthday party just two weeks later.  Still working on it.

Madilynn Alyshia Smith

Madillynn Alyshia Smith, Sissy.  The little girl I prayed for, for 8 1/2 years.  The little girl I knew in my heart would come.  And yep, I knew she would be a little girl.  For more on my pregnancy with her look here at my old blog
http://momtofive07.blogspot.com/2008/03/what-that-means.html

Maddi is an adventure everyday.  Anyway already reading this blog knows this about her.  There is no grey area with her, black or white only.  She reminds me of Missy in that way. She's smart and funny.  She loves life.  She has an amazing imagination.  I'm learning soooo much through her.  I'm so glad I have her, so glad God gave her to us, right when he did.

Madilynn Alyshia Smith

3 years ago

Madilynn Alyshia Smith

3 years old

Mikayla Jill Smith

One day in the fall of 1997 Mike came home to a hysterically crying wife.  Very concerned he asked me what was wrong, I very seriously informed him that I thought Melissa, roughly 20 months at the time must surely hate me as she hadn't napped or slept in days and I was exhausted and didn't feel well. .....  He looked at me very seriously and asked me if  I had ever had a period yet???  He stated that he had seen me "in this sort of state" before and he believed I might be pregnant.  I informed him, (still hystercial) that it was NOT possible!!  Later after calming down a bit, perhaps taking a nap, I don't remember I decided he might be right.  The next day I found out he was definately right!

Looking back at it now with time and perspective it I should have seen it before Mike did, tired all the time, weepy, and Missy was nursing a little less as well.

Anyway, he was right and I'm so thankful!  Mikayla Jill Smith was born on April 16th 1998.  Two day after her Aunt Abby's birthday and the day after her cousin Greggs.  She weighed 8 lbs 6 0z and was 20 inches.  She came really fast and was a little purple at first with lots of curly dark hair.  When Diane got to the hospital she was in the nursery and Mike walked down with her to see the baby,  they looked at one beautiful newborn girl and thought that couldn't be her, she was african american....Guess what, that was her!!  They felt pretty silly as I remember.

Her daddy started calling her Kadie Bug from day one, and thats what she goes by still, 12  years later.  I'm not sure how he got Kadie out of Mikayla....had we known what a sporty girl tomboy she was going to be we might have gone with Mickey.   We named her Mikayla for Mike and Jill for me, thought it was clever naming "our last one" after both of us.  Hahaha, kind of funny now, of course, Mike was really the only one that believed that she would be the last.

Kadie was a mellow easy baby from the very first day, what a relief.  Also, from the moment we brought her home her and Missy have been best friends.  While Missy was Michaels special girl Meggie really took to Kadie.

Kadie is very sensitive to other peoples feelings.  She would NEVER deliberately hurt anyones feelings.  She also has a very strong faith, and will not go against that.  I'm proud of her for that. 

Kadie is my only tomboy ( so far) , that  has been a learning experience for me, I'm pretty far from tomboy so learning and accepting her period when she ONLY wanted to dress like a boy, right down to her underoos as a toddler, took me some time.  Recently, however my pretty tomboy has started to become a beautiful young lady and while she does still dress "sporty" she does it in a girly kind of way.  Hmmmm, makes me miss those early tomboy days........

She's terrific with younger children, mostly in that she makes EVERYTHING fun for them. Instead of trying to get them to do what she wants she does what they want.  She loves reading the Bible to Maddi, I love watching them lay in bed together while sharing Bible time, it's precious.  When I'm at the end of my rope with a tired and grouchy toddler, ( or 2 if Logan is here) Kadie swoops in with something amazingly fun to do and rescues us.

She looks like her daddy, much more so then the rest of the kids, she's a little ornery like him and Michael.  Sometimes it frustrates me, mostly it makes me giggle.  When she grows up she wants to have biological children, and adopt.  She has an awesome philosophy.  She may someday be an activist,  she VERY much wants everyone to be treated fairly.  Her favorite song is "What if His People Prayed", you should here her jam to this line "...What if the family turned to Jesus Stopped asking Oprah what to do..."  LOVE it!

All in all, she's an amazing person.  Beautiful on the inside and out. Great Christian example for her 2 little sisters and her friends.  I'm so proud that she's my daughter.  Even prouder that I know she's someone I would WANT to know, even if she wasn't mine. Cool huh?

Mikayla Jill Smith

12 years ago

Mikayla Jill Smith

12 years old

My Crew on Easter

Look how my family is growing...

Lightening up the mood with pictures!

Check out her eyes, this picture is completely unedited, that's what a turquoise shirt does to her eyes.

My Little Brother

Let me introduce you to my little brother.  Gerald Wayne Dougherty

Now one with my new Sister In Law, Manami

Next with my brand new nephew Connor Ken Dougherty

And the the very handsome Connor Ken

I've seen Gerry twice in our lives, once when he was 5 years old and had first come to the United States. Next, 11 years later, the summer he was 16 years old. He had grown up in New York and was visiting VERY rural America staying with sisters that had ZERO experience with a 16 year old.  I wish that summer had gone better, for everyone, especially him.  Over the years we've had some phone conversations, not frequently, and on a few occasions where he was in trouble with his mother and she wanted me to talk to him.  We've never really known each other, but he's always called me Sis, I've always kinda liked that.  It spoke of a connection, one that was deeper then blood, one that I wanted to have but never knew how.

The situation has been difficult, and odd.  We didn't even know about him until he was 2. We've grown up years and miles apart, the one person that should have fostered our bond long gone. I've thought of him often, much more often then I've spoken to  him. The last visit with him was a long time ago.  We were adults and he was still a child. Again, we've spoken a few times over the years, regretfully though often going a year or more with no contact.  I knew through "the uncles" that he had joined the marines.  Almost 3years ago he called when he was fresh off of a deployment and I had just had Maddi. I didn't talk to him again for over 2 years.  Then......he found us on Facebook, strange huh?  We chatted a little, and he called me on the phone.
He's a grown up now, an adult like his sisters. He's a DADDY, wow!  I'm an Aunt, again, to another precious nephew.  We've talked on the phone a couple times, and on the computer, a couple times.  We've "commented" back and forth.   Something has clicked, I feel it, not just a "blood bond" because he's dads child too.  I'm feeling, REALLY feeling, he's my brother.  I don't want to go 2 years without talking to him, or 1 year, or several months even.  I want to hear from him weekly.  I want to really get to know this little brother of mine, and my nephew, and my sister in law.

We can't go back and redo how things have been.  However, we can hold on to this new relationship, move forward and become family...real family.

Some background.....

Below is a post from my old blog written the day after my dads birthday in 2008. I've copied it to here because some of you might need some background to understand another post I'm working on.

Tuesday, September 16, 2008


Happy Birthday Dad

Yesterday was the 21st anniversary of my fathers death. It would have also been his 55th birthday. He died on his 34th, that is 3 years younger then what I am now.



The subject of my dad is tied up with so many different emotions that I rarely talk about him to be honest. My dad left my mom, my sisters and I 3 years before he died and we never saw or spoke to him again. I was 13 years old when he left and 16 when he died. I did receive one letter from him in that 3 year time span. For many years I took it out and read it often, then just on his birthdays ( again, ironically also the anniversary of his death). I didn't read it this year and didn't mention out loud to anyone, even those that know what the day was.



The day after he died we found out that we had a stepmother and two year old brother.



When my dad first left all those years ago I was devastated, as were my sisters. We were also very angry and went back in forth between those two emotions, often having them at the same time. I wrote him a few letters, some sad and weepy and some full of anger, bitterness and why? I have often worried that the last letter he received was an angry one, I hope not.



A lot of people were surprised that dad left. I was not. My parents did not have a healthy relationship, and honestly my dad was not a healthy person at the time. My mom was not perfect either, but she did not deserve what she got during their marriage or after.



Over the years it has been difficult for me to reconcile the two people my dad could be with the one that he was, does that make sense?? He could be awful, I mean really awful. But he could also be really wonderful.



Dad loved God, even when he was lost I believe he had that in his heart. Dad taught us to love God also, and I thank him for that. He read to us often from the Bible. Random verses that he felt applied at the time. Always finishing with 1st Corinthians 13. He wanted us to know this. He would lay at the foot of my bed and read to his 3 daughters. It's the clearest good memories I have of him and I hold them dear in my heart.



Over the years I have sometimes only been able to focus on the bad memories and the sadness of abandonment and the issues that left my sisters and I dealing with.



Now, at this point in my life I feel sadness, some sadness for myself and the little girl inside that sometimes still wants and needs a daddy. Sadness for my children that don't have a grandpa. Mostly I feel sadness for him. He had wonderful potential in so many ways. I feel sad for the man he sometimes was and could have always been. I feel sad for the father that missed so many things while his little girls were growing up ( and his son). I feel sad that he's not here to see the amazing women that we've become and how close we are and how much we love each other. I feel sad for him that because he's gone, that his daughters and son never really got to know each other.



I look around at his 13 grandchildren, 5 of which are my own and I know how much he would have loved and enjoyed them. I can see some of him in some of them....



Mostly I'm sad for the good man that got lost and I hope that he was found.


ADDED 3/30/2009

So I had never seen this picture before Sunday ( 3/28)  Uncle Steve posted it on FB in response to Gerry asking for pictures of Dad.  I'll admit it took my breath away for a moment when I saw it.  I can't really put a finger on why. Uncle Steve said it captured him well, he's right.  He looks young, vital and maybe even happy in this picture.  I can see it like it was yesterday, in my memory...I bet it was a great day.  It also looks, just a little bit like he was running away, just a little......I think that's why.  Anyway, it makes me happy, and sad...but I like it, alot.

WALKING!!

All of my babies have walked early, talked early too.  Missy was my earliest walker at 8 months, Meggie the latest at 10 months, the other four all started walking in their 9th month.  Miss Mellie has officially jumped off the "taking steps" definition, ( which she started at 8 months) to officially walking.  Here's a video I took recently.

Long Week and Advice from Sis

Last week was a really long week, Mellie was sick and we just didn't get a lot accomplished.  On Tuesday at naptime when things were super hectic here's what I heard, my own words, repeated back to me from my VERY smart almost 3 year old

"Mom, would you like to tell me why you is so grumpy?"

Friday, Mellie was still sick, looonnnggeer day since our little man was out to late the night before,  Maddi trying to talk me into "nummies" while Mellie was having nummies.

"Mom, look at me, just take a deep breath and don't be mad!"

And how could I be after that?

More about the Diva

Sister is a character, maybe she'll be an actress someday.  After talking to our wonderful NP last week at Mellies 9 month check I realized that I needed to write some more about Maddi and her activities.  I've started a million different posts but get interrupted and never get back.

Currently, and for the last several months one of her favorite things to play is Momma.  She likes to put a baby doll in her belly and pretend like she is having a baby. While she still has the baby in her belly her and another baby will go to town and see dr ____ and he will check on her baby in her belly.  Pretty soon it will be time to "go get the baby out" so she will climb up on the side of the couch and pull her knees up and pretend she's having the baby.  She makes lamaze breathing noises and sometimes she squeals REALLY loudly. Then, she will pull the baby out of her shirt, wrap him or her in a blankie ( cuz they're still slimy) and show them off to me or whoever else is in the room.  Adorable. And her babies ALWAYS "drink a nummies" never a bottle.  Also, when I'm in the bathtub she wants to play midwife and have me "push push push"....I think it's genius and we have a future ob something on our hands, nurse, midwife, perhaps even doctor.  However, it totally FREAKS my poor husband out.

It's become such an interesting thing to have teenagers and toddlers in this house. I have had lots of toddlers, but we are just now experiencing this interesting interaction.  She learns alot from her big sisters, she is fascinated with hair, makeup, clothes, Taylor Hotner ( my older girls name for that boy that plays a wolf on some movie :) )

Recent quotes:
"Mommy,you think  my daddy is hotter then Taylor Hottner?"

While dancing with her

"STOP shaking your butt momma, after you is a mom you have to stop shaking your butt!!!"

" But I not want to behave, I not LIKE to!!!"

My favorite

"Mommy, you is the best mom I ever saw in the whole world!"

" Can I please still drinka nummies, just for a minute?" 

Trying to reason with me about her less then favorable behavior on the car trip

"The reason I'm being grouchy is 'cuz my carseat is pink and only has little purple flowers, I told you I wanted my big girl car seat to be ALL the way purple, then I wouldn't be growly...."

Many more to come.....................

Mellie 9 months

I can't believe that baby girl is 9 months old.  Time is flying by so quickly, so bittersweet.  She continues to be the sweetest little baby girl ever.  These pictures were taken at her 9 month photoshoot with my sister Lish of Alicia Steinmann Photography.  Awesome aren't they!!

Mellie

Pure Cuteness right here!!

Catching up Again and Mushy stuff about my family

We've had the crud.......again. Winter needs to end.   I need to open my doors and windows and let fresh air and sunshine in, to kill the germies.......We've been sneezing, coughing, vomiting and well, pooping, alot.  I'm healthy this round and so is Mel, thank God ( because I prayed for Mellie not to get it and He's good), and breastmilk ( solid gold immunities)

Sis has felt the yuckiest followed closely by Missy.  Missy was the child that taught me about diva's, Sis has put Missy to shame and girlfriend does NOT like to be uncomfortable. Loooonnnngggg week.

Before everyone got ill we had a fantastic day at my sister Lish new place for Eyans birthday celebration.  It was a wonderful day, these kids, Lish, Ambers and mine are so much more then cousins.  Watching the interaction between them is amazing, and Lish sooo captured it,  See for yourself.

Do you see it?

Missy cheered this year for our basketball boys, they actually made it to state, didn't place but it was a good time.  Here are a few pics of my cheer girl.

Just because they are so cute here a couple Lish took of Sis and Mel too.

We call this her money face, it's adorable

Pretty girl

Kadie Jill Chillin'

Missy pouting because her big brother was threatening to show up at the movies with her

Meagan continues with her Sr. year, ready to get it over and move on. Michael is doing well, still job hunting.

Redecorating

Attempting a little redecorating here on my blog.....

8 months old Melanie Faith

Little Beanie Baby is 8 months old today. It's going way tooooooo fasssttt for her mommy. I keep trying to tell her she doesn't have to everything so fast and to sloooowwww down. She's not listening.

She continues to be the sweetest little baby, smooshie and lovey dovey. And BUSY!!!! She doesn't sit still for a second, a little when she's sleeping but she's pretty squirmy even then.

She loves to play with her left foot when she's nursing, she wiggles it around pats me on the chest with it. Cute! Recently she has started to nurse a little, suck on her big toe a little, nurse a little, you get the picture!

Adorable. I just love her more every second, look at this face.

The Yuk and other Craziness

So first I had a cold, then I threw my back out again. Kinda of a cruddy couple of weeks between the two. Cold is gone and back is getting there. AND, despite the fact that I've been off the treadmill for 2 weeks (almost) I've managed to lose 4 lbs. YAY Me! That puts me 4 lbs closer to my goal.



The girls, well Missy and Mikayla have been crazy busy! Volleyball practices and games and basketball games and cheerleading all running one into the next. This week 3 days in row they left home at 8 am and didn't return until around 9 pm. Crazy for Jr. High kids. I can't wait for it to slow down and neither can they. I'm happy to say that their grades are still great too.

Teenagers and Toddlers

10 years ago, or the last time I had a toddler in this house I didn't have a teenger just yet. No real talking about boyfriends and clothes and teenager drama.

Sis listens to every word her big sisters say, she thinks they are awesome and wants to be like them.

Leading to a few new Maddi'isms
" I broked up with my bofriend (I left the y out deliberately, that's how she says it) because he told me wrongo bongo and I not like dat!"

"Ummm, I think dat girl is wearing hoochiemomma makeup"

"Momma, can you wear hoochiemomma make up and still be nice 'cuz I like to wear lots of makeup!"

"Her is really a drama queen, it drives me crazy!"

"Riley is a poopchunk!"

"Momma, I wanna look at my prom dresses on the 'puter"

This is just the tip of the iceberg.

Happy 21st Birthday Michael Eugene Smith!!

Michael Eugene Smith

8 lbs 1 0z

20 inches

January 22nd, 1989

He was the cutest thing I had ever seen in my life, all that black hair and round face, chubby cheeks. They lay him on my chest and he started nursing and I fell in love with this little man, my baby boy, my only boy.

I was home with him everyday, and all we did was play and snuggle and play and snuggle. From the minute he was born until he was nearly three the only place he slept was laying on my chest. What a snuggle bear. Mike and I spent so much time just staring at him that in the car he would say "turn around turn around" because he wanted us to STOP staring.

He loved listening to Dwight Yokem, repeatedly. He loved both his great grandpas. He was blessed to have them both. Oh, he loved his great grandma Ginger too. Of course his other grandparents as well.

When he was 2 1/2 he got a baby sister, his first one. He loved her so much and she bossed him around from day one!

He kept getting sisters as everyone who knows us already knows. When Missy came in 96, he hugged me and cried and told me how thankful he was that God gave him another sister and that we were all healthy. PRECIOUS! They are so close to this day.

He is maybe the biggest mommas boy EVER! In jr. high and high school he could really push my buttons, and especially Mikes. He got a little lost in highschool, not drugs or alcohol. More lack of motivation. He didn't graduate with his class and learned a really hard lesson.

In the fall of 2007 he lost his best friend. It was devastating to all of us and something that will affect him his whole life. He really loved Justin. We all did.

He's an adult now. He's not perfect, but he is amazing. He still struggles a little with motivation, but he's getting there. He got his GED right away. He's had several jobs and he's currently searching hard for a new one. He plans to go back to college in the fall. He's had the same very sweet girlfriend that we love very much for almost 4 years. They have lived together for a year and a half.

He is an amazing brother and son. We talk on the phone at least twice a day. Him and his girlfriend do NOT drink and party, in fact, if they have a free weekend all they want to do is have his sister come stay. He spent his 21st birthday with his parents and his girlfriend. He helps his grandma with everything, from dropping off her water bill to shutting in her chickens, even though they freak him out.

He's a LOT like me,he's a worrier. He's a little like his dad and has a hot head, that's getting better too. He's big softie mushball. He's trying really hard to be a surrogate brother to Justins baby sister and it makes my heart melt to see him do that.

I've NEVER seen another boy so involved with their sisters, he just really loves, cares for and wants the best for them. They are so blessed to have him.

This baby and I have grown up together. I probably made my biggest mistakes as a parent with him, but we have both grown and learned.

I thank God for this little boy that made me a mom, and for the man that he's growing to be.

Happy 39th Birthday to Me!!

Today I'm 39 years old, I only have one year left in my 30's and I'm sooo excited! It's funny really, when I was 29 the thought of turning 30 was not a pleasant one for me. I was all in turmoil, we had 4 of our kids, but our relationship was strained. I was trying to figure out what I wanted, was I going to go to school and if so what for?? I was a little overwhelmed to say the least...



In the ten years between then and now I went to school, graduated, worked on my career, went into management (hated it), spent too many hours at work and missed WAY to much at home, with my babies AND my hubby.



Now, I'm 39, and I'm excited about 40. Life is still crazy, don't misunderstand me. We have 6 children now, 21 years old down to 7 months. I'm again wondering about school, maybe, maybe not. Undecided really. But life is GOOD! And I know it, I think that's the difference. Life was good then, I just didn't know HOW good. I had to spend a few years finding something, only to find out.....wait a minute I already have it.

The most important thing that has changed is that I've put God first in my life, once I did that then everything fell into place around me.


Come on 40, and 50, and 60........you get the picture!

Christmas

Christmas was great! Fun memory making time with our friends the McFalls on Christmas Eve then home to find Santa had been here already, our house must have been one of his first stops! Michael & Brit, Meggie & Brandon, Mike, myself, Missy, Kadie, Maddi and Melanie, fun! Sis was so excited over her vanity set that wasn't wrapped that she started flinging (literally) the rest of her presents out of the way to get to it. Christmas is awesome with 2year olds. Every gift she opened she said " OH, this was JUST what me wanted!!!" The rest of the kids really enjoyed watching her and everyone was happy with their own gifts as well.

Here are a few pics!

Happy Birthday Missy Moo!

14 years ago last night at around 11:34 Melissa Marie Smith was born. 6lbs 4 oz and 18 tiny inches of her. She was by far the smallest of my babies, but she began to show us very early on that big things (personalities) come in small packages. Her big brother fell in love with her the minute he saw her and she is still very much a "bubby's girl". He went in the bathroom with me and cried and cried when we made it home safely that day.



I shared this pregnancy with my sister Lish, and it still stands out in my mind, and that makes the pregnancy itself extra special.

She seemed so tiny at first, everything but those big eyes.

Missy was all BIG brown eyes and fluffy hair, little bitty girl that wanted her mama! It was with Missy that I first discovered "wearing" my babies, because she wanted to be held all the time. It was with Missy that I learned about "high needs" babies and toddlers. High needs as in "I highly need all your attention right now mom!". Sometimes when she was a toddler she would storm off to her room for "by myself time". She was sweet and sassy and so much fun! So determined, this little bitty baby walked at 8 months, she looked like a baby doll walking.

Now, at 14, she's still all big brown eyes in a little bitty package. She's a funny, happy girl. I very rarely see her in a bad mood ever. She's still loud and loves to sing! She's in love with her little sisters and best friends with her sister Kadie. She was in the room with me when Melanie was born, I hope that moment was as special to her as it was to me, I know it will be special for their relationship. She has a very strong opinion on what's right and what's wrong and stands firmly in her convictions. She is very much a social butterfly, loves to hang out with her friends, but does NOT follow the crowd and is not afraid to tell her friends if they are making a mistake. Even though our little house drives her crazy she loves our big family and wants to have 10 or more children herself someday. She's very mature for her age, responsible, but she's not afraid to still act like a kid, I LOVE that.
Out of all my girls she is the most like me, good and not as good alike. She says that she's a daddys girl, but for a daddys girl she loves to snuggle her mom...She could read all day....She really appreciates all we do for her...There are so many things about our Missy Moo, my mini-me that I love and appreciate and admire. I look so forward to watching her grow into womanhood and pray that the closeness we have now continues to strengthen over time. Oh, and did I mention that besides being this amazing and wonderful young woman that she is also gorgeous?

I REALLY love this girl, so glad God gave her to us.